Don't Want to Lose You
by Cleansed
Summary: "I want you to be here. So we can be a family. I want our child to have a mother, as well as a father. And... I... I don't what I'd do without you, Rose." His head sank, and he took it in his hands. "I don't..." "Greg..." "I don't want to lose you." (dramatic angst w/ fluff ending)(cross-post with ao3)


It probably started with Sour Cream, he figured.

He still had the shakes from that day. Once in a while, a nightmare would fire off in his head, and he'd imagine Vidalia's child and himself plummeting from the Ferris wheel, only to be caught in one of the carriages. How the world flashed by in that instant, how his life had been damn near over, only to have it amazingly march forward unharmed. All thanks to her.

Yeah. It was Sour Cream's fault. And he couldn't wait to thank him when he was older.

Beach City was experiencing a record cloudy day. The forecast reckoned that the gray blanket of cloud would rule the skies for the week's remainder. With business slower than ever, the man called Greg Universe looked up at the pallidness and, as he sat in his lawn chair, hummed.

It was the down season. A great slowing of business, brought on by a lack of tourists. Fair enough, commonality among these seaside towns. People just didn't come out for the fry bits or pizza or arcade games or... well, anything, when the season wasn't in swing. Most of the people here, they ran seasonal commodities. He ran a regular service. Not as honorable or heroic as, say, a firefighter, or cop. But it was something. Honest work. The last thing he expected to be doing with his life. Then again, he didn't mind it, especially since people always needed their cars washed.

Except when it rains, he guessed, only time I have to worry about losing business.

He thought about when he first started working at It's a Wash. It'd been a while already. A few years, in fact. Shortly after Sour Cream was born, that's when his tenure there began. He'd started to grow a stubble in the time since, started to hear his back crack a little more each day.

Yup. Greg was getting kinda old.

He grinned at the thought of being a geezer on his knees, throwing his arms to the skies, yelling 'NOOOOOO' with award-winning gusto. It'd be a while until that happened, or anything like it, and he was cool with waiting. He didn't even mind the gut he was developing. In fact, she and him had gotten a little tipsy last week and had compared bellies. Of course, she won out, but he couldn't help but think that a certain little someone had helped her. That or Pearl had been playing favorites.

He shrugged, took a swig of his cola. Maybe they should've made Garnet the judge.

The sky kept it's gloom, and the city was still as death. Down season really was down. Greg looked down the street, trying to see if anyone- _any_one- was out today. He locked his vision down the street, but after a few moments of unblinking attentiveness, he sighed and took another drink. He polished off the can, then tossed it back behind him. There was a tinny clang, and Greg sighed again. One of these days, he'll land one without looking, just like her.

A thought popped in his mind, and he tilted to look back at the sky. Business was deader than one of his old concerts, so why should he have to stick around? He owned the place, anyhow. He lifted himself up from the lawn chair, picked it up, folded it as he walked over to the car wash's garage. He placed it by the door, then bent over to pick up the can and popped it into the recycling bin. One point, if only for effort.

Greg locked up the joint, started heading to the beach. The wind was light, presenting little resistance. The town, alive yet silent. Everyone curled up in their caves, nothing to worry or disturb them. The earth, safe, for a time at least. This got him thinking about her.

The story of how he had met Rose Quartz had turned to legend by now. Everyone knew it: The so-called Mr. Universe, po-dunk nobody rockstar wannabe, had met some strange tourist lady with unnaturally pink hair and a large belly button piercing. So large her wedding dress (that's what people assumed it was) had a star-shaped hole just for it.

Odd, yes?

But they hit it off, as they say. Greg with all his immaturity and enthusiasm, Rose and her own rather angelic qualities; it was an unusual pairing, perhaps. But things seemed to work out. The boy who would be a rocker now owned an honest business and had a partner who loved him.

And even more amazingly... they had a child on the way. He was going to be a father.

How'd he do it? He honestly couldn't say. There'd been times when Mr. Smiley, local arcade baron, would ask what his secret was. Greg always shrugged and said, "Not my place to say." Because it really wasn't: only Rose knew what he'd done to make it work, really. He was just pleased to be with her.

As the end of the street came to meet him, he felt his stepping perk up. He felt an excited pounding in his chest, which, for whatever reason, made him think of aliens. Not the kind he liked or "preferred" but the kind in movies, the ones that break out of people's bodies in spectacular fashion.

Probably shouldn't have shown that to Rose. At least he knew she didn't like horror movies, now.

Greg grinned as he feet finally hit the sand, and he picked up the pace. He, as best he could, began jogging towards the rocky face of the lighthouse's hill. Slowly, the grass that led up to it turned to black, majestic rock. Kicking up tufts of sand in his wake, he ran, so quickly that he didn't notice the untamed rock transform into the carved giantess now before him. Once he'd come around, the skeleton of a house-in-progress greeted him. But as he finished making that final turn, his chest began to hurt, and he stopped to prop himself on his knees and catch his breath. He huffed and heaved, eventually making himself laugh at his own unhealthiness. And let that be a lesson to me, he thought, to start getting into shape.

Once his breath was back in his system at a regular pace, Greg began walking to the temple. The new stairs leading up to the unfinished house creaked not in weakness. They were brand new planks of wood, and were still adapting to various weights. He climbed the stairs, reached the new balcony, and walked to the door, letting himself in with the key that Rose had given him.

Empty; they were out on another mission. He took a moment to admire the progress: the walls and everything were finally in place, but plumbing and furniture hadn't been put in. Hell, none of it had even been bought yet.

He walked to the kitchen, opened the temporary mini-fridge, and began rummaging. There wasn't much: a bunch of leftovers from who knows where, some near-expired milk, and a Petri dish with something green and fuzzy in it. That last one, that was probably Pearl's.

Greg looked around. The joint was dead. But he still thought to call out, just to be sure. "Amethyst! If these are yours, speak up! Or else I'm gonna eat them and not leave any for youuu~!"

The faint wind from outside almost whispered to him, telling him to go ahead.

"Alright! Your loss!" Licking his lips, he grabbed at a small pizza box, pulled it out and opened. Four slices of pepperoni, extra cheese, thick crust. They must've left in a hurry for her to not get a chance to eat all of it.

With Rose and the rest of the "Crystal Gems," as they called themselves, always going out on missions, Greg was relegated to staying behind and waiting for them to warp back to the temple. The waiting game was never fun, excruciating at first, but he'd slowly gotten better at amusing himself accordingly. Some while ago, he'd had the smart idea to leave one of his electric guitars at the house as a distraction, along with a battery-powered mini-amp. He sat down on a designated pile of wood, picked up the axe, and plugged it in. A loud _wooooo_ of feedback made him cringe, but it soon subsided. With the first slice in his mouth, he started playing, starting the jam with a little blues improvisation.

He started slow, a few wide string bends, before absently reaching for the whammy bar. Only to be reminded that Amethyst, when she was much smaller, had eaten it. He always forgot about that. The jam would not stop here, fortunately, and Greg broke into a slow-burning solo, letting single notes ring only so he could grab another slice of 'za.

After a while, the familiar tinkling of the warp pad made him seize. He looked up to see little glints of light starting to form around the raised glass circle. A smile plastered itself on his face, and he waited excitedly for Rose, as well as the others, to appear.

The sparkles appeared and vanished with increasing speed, and the beautiful tone hearkened their arrival grew louder in his ears. He rested the guitar against the wood, and stood to greet them.

Four shadows appeared in the sudden column of light, and Greg felt a loud, hearty hello rising in his throat and he-

"UNACCEPTABLE!"

His smile faltered as Pearl's outburst filled the temple. She stormed immediately off the pad and into the house's exposed musculature, only stopping to spin around and point an accusatory finger at his partner. "How dare you! How DARE you be so... so _selfish!_"

"Pearl, settle down." Ever the rational voice, Garnet slowly moved towards the distressed comrade. "It's her decision, and you know that-"

"NO! She can't just make decide something like that on your own! Without speaking to _us_ first! This is _insane_!"

He had never seen such violence break out between them before. Outside of the occasional training exercises, as well as arguments over Amethyst's behavior, The Crystal Gems had always retained a decent sense of cohesiveness and mutual understanding.

To Hell with that, Greg figured.

Pearl stood, breathing heavily, with manic eyes. Her extended arm began to shake. He stepped back a bit; regardless of his relative safe distance, there was no way to predict what she'd do now. Not in this state.

"It's his fault... isn't it?"

Since arriving, Rose had been quiet, with head hung low. But upon Pearl's utterance of 'his,' her head snapped up. Her eyes... Greg had never seen them like this. Ever. Such offense... such anger...

It seemed to be the response the former servant had been looking for. She dropped her arm, and seemingly bent forward in agony. She never looked away from her commander. "I knew it... heh... hehehe... hahaha... I KNEW IT!"

Amethyst had been hiding behind Rose, cowering at this new enraged Pearl. But now, she'd come out, ready for a fight. "Leave him out of this! Greg's been nothing but good to her! He wouldn't push her to make a decision like this!"

Shivers, along his spine. Goose flesh. Palms of sweat. Oh God, what... what did I do? he fearfully wondered.

"Stay out of this! You're a child, you can't understand! Neither of you can!"

Garnet now stood between Rose, still on the warp pad, and Pearl, in the middle of the house-in-progress. She removed her visor, and with her three eyes, looked at her friend with pleading eyes. "Pearl, you need to calm down."

"Wha... Ga-garnet! Doesn't this upset you?!"

"Of course it does. But I won't stop her from doing what she needs to, let alone what she _wants_."

Dust, for a moment, settled, and the fly on the wall finally spoke. "What... happened?"

The four Gems turned to face their once-ignored fifth guest. Greg stood, almost trembling. His eyes met all of theirs: Rose, fearful, shocked. Amethyst, saddened, scared. Garnet, surprised, terrified. And Pearl... pure murder.

"YOU!"

It happened so quickly: with a battle cry, Pearl took out her spear from her Gemstone, and lunged at the human. Garnet moved to intercept, but couldn't keep up. Amethyst rushed towards the impending slaughter yelling "NO!" And Greg, reaching beyond his abilities, grabbed his guitar, and raised it just in time to catch the spear blade between its pickups. His eyes, having shut themselves in the chaos, opening slowly. The ice-blue tip sat an inch away from his face. Garnet and Amethyst stood behind her, armed with gauntlets and whip, respectively, ready to fight her if necessary.

Pearl stared him down with the violence of a killer who'd been wronged. Her breath was hot, venomous. The handle of the spear shook in her hands as she pushed downward, forcing Greg to his knees. Her teeth, barred, almost fang-like. "You... will not... take her... away... _from me_," she snarled, just enough for only him to hear. He tried to force her back, but the strength was too great. The spear's tip slid, in increments, through the instrument. It closed in on his neck. This is how I die, he thought as he felt his arms give in.

"Pearl! Stand down!"

The voice's sweetness subdued the rage, if only by a bit. Pearl's head turned, slowly, with small jerking movements, to see Rose standing over her. "Stand. Down."

Tears filled her eyes, and Pearl threw the spear, with guitar, aside and out of Greg's hands. It dropped with a dull thud, and she stood there, defeated. Rose looked to Garnet. "Take her to her room. Stay with her. I'll speak with her later." She turned to Greg, and tried to smile. All he could do was tremble. Rose sniffed, and bent down to greet him. "Hey," she whispered.

"H-hey... what... what the hell's going on?"

She set her hands on her shoulders, and squeezed lovingly. "C'mon, stand up." She helped him to his feet.

Pearl took a few steps back, and was stopped by Garnet. "Come." She twisted herself out of the fusion's grasp. "Don't," she scolded, and away Pearl went to the temple door, to her room, alone. Greg caught her eye as the door closed on the temple, and was pricked by immense fear.

"H-hey, Greg." He looked down, and Amethyst was staring up at him, trying to be positive. "Hey," he said, and chuckled meekly. "Sorry I ate your pizza."

"Pizza?" She tilted her head.

"Yeah, the, uh, the box of pizza? Pepperoni? Extra cheese?"

"That was mine." Greg gulped as Garnet stepped into the little group forming around him. "Oh, crap," he muttered, only to be stopped by her hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. I forgot it was there. I wasn't going to eat it."

"But maybe I was going to!" said Amethyst.

"No you weren't. You didn't even know it was there."

Amethyst huffed, crossed her arms.

Greg, voice cracking, said, "Um... I hate to dwell on this, but... what-"

Rose took his hand. "Let's go sit by the beach."

"Huh?"

"I... want to talk to you about something."

He looked to the two others. They'd become morose, had turned away. Rose, she was smiling, but her eyes had become tearful, almost burdened.

"Sure, Rose... whatever you want."

She took him by the hand, guided him out the door, holding tightly. As they passed by one of the front windows, Greg saw Garnet bent down, holding Amethyst tightly. Like she was trying to keep her held together.

. . .

All he could hear were waves. Harmonious static. The white noise of nature.

They had been sitting for a while. The gray sky was smoothed out over the ocean. They thought they'd seen a seagull, but it was just a log floating by. The day had ceased to progress; for her, it'd only felt like a moment. For him, a lifetime.

He hadn't looked at her until she'd said everything. She didn't want to prod him for a response. She knew humans better than that.

His eyes kept at the sea. But finally, speech bubbled up from down deep.

"You sure there's no other way?"

She sighed. "I've considered everything."

"And?"

"Garnet has advised against every other option."

"... stupid future vision."

He heard her chuckle, then go silent again.

He spoke. "I wish we could've discussed it more. I should've been there."

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to put us through more stress. I mean, with the baby on the way, we're already worn out."

"Worn out? We can't be worn out, we still have to raise it!"

She chuckled again. The waves splashed as they snuck up on their feet, never getting very far in the end.

"I'm so sorry about Pearl."

He shuddered.

"I know," she said, putting an arm around him, bringing him in close. "I'm going to have a talk with her. She can be... very emotional. I think she's just seen so much that she gets worked up very easily. This trajectory her life's taken, it fights against everything she knows."

He didn't understand, and he looked to her face for answers. She merely returned his gaze with a sad grin. "Gem stuff," she said.

"You know... you should tell me these things now, r-right? I mean, if... if you're not going to... be... be..." He felt himself crack under the weight, and he shoved his face into her shoulder. Arms latching around her waist. Little kicks to complete the portrait.

"I know. But I don't want you getting caught up in a fight that's not your own, you know? I don't want to leave this world knowing you'll be putting yourself in danger." She strengthened her arm around her, and brought the other around to keep him close. "You don't have to worry about that, okay?" She rubbed his back, just how he liked it. She played with his hair, just how she liked to. Even if he didn't.

"Rose, our son slash daughter, they'll be born into this whole mess."

"The others will teach them about Homeworld, and about Gems, and about _being _a Gem."

"Then what do I do? I'm the father!"

"Then _be_ a father."

He brought his face out from her shoulder, put his eyes towards hers.

"Raise them right. Just be there for them. Tell them about me, tell them everything they want to know about me, as you knew me. Just... be there. Not just for me. But because they're your child. _Our _child. Teach them about music and being human. Teach them about appreciating everything here, on this planet. Teach them about fry bits and guitar chords and car wash brushes, all of it. And teach them about love. And empathy. And kindness."

"But I can't do this alone! I don't _want_ to do this alone! I want you to be here, for all of it! I want you to see them grow up and learn about the world and being a Crystal Gem! I want you to show them that there's still beauty in the world!"

"You don't need me for that."

"Rose, that's not..." His turn to sigh. "... that's not the point."

"Hmm?"

He shifted out from her embrace, and got on his knees before her, between her outstretched legs. "I want you to be here. So we can be a family. I want our child to have a mother, as well as a father. And... I... I don't what I'd do without you, Rose." His head sank, and he took it in his hands. "I don't..."

"Greg..."

"I don't want to lose you."

"You won't." Her hand lifted his chin. The gazes met, and they stared for a moment. It was time for her eyes to let flow their tears. "Part of me will always be with you, and them. Just like in those space movies you like so much."

He felt it overwhelm him, and could take no more. He cried in her arms for as long as he needed. She did her best to stay strong, for him at least, but ultimately gave in to it as well.

The lovers cried. The waves pushed on.

. . .

The evening rode in on the tide. They continued to sit, simply watching the sky turn dark, like always. The tears from before had dried, but now, they were content.

Footsteps approached from behind. An elegant clearing-of-the-throat was heard. Greg froze, and gripped Rose's hand white-knuckled. She simply patted the top of it, reassuringly.

"Rose, I've come to speak with Greg."

"I said I'd come talk to you myself."

"Forgive my... transgression, but I come on my own accord."

Rose looked to Greg. He closed his eyes, shuddered a breath, and nodded. "Yeah, Pearl?"

Nothing for a moment. A deep pause came between them, but it would not remain.

"I apologize for attacking you. I acted immaturely, irrationally. I... should never have tried to kill you, even if it was my intention, in that moment. I do not expect forgiveness."

Another pause, with a slight shuffle of fabric. "I'm sorry... Greg."

He could tell, somehow, that she was bowing in shame. But he took his free hand, and waved her off. "I forgive you."

Rose, for the first time that day, smiled warmly. Greg, too, found a smile in himself as he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it softly. He kept looking to the ocean, though, never turning to meet the apology's harbinger.

"Pearl?"

"Yes, Rose?"

"Help Greg raise our child. Garnet and Amethyst, too. Promise me that you'll do it."

Pearl made a gasping noise. "But...!"

"Pearl. Please."

A hesitation. Greg didn't look back. Rose did.

"... I promise."

She nodded. Footsteps again, fainting now, into the sound of waves crashing. They went back to watching the sky turn.

Suddenly, Greg jolted up from his spot. "Wait! I have an idea!" He took off towards the house-temple hybrid.

"What?!" Rose shouted after him.

"Just... just stay here!"

His speed betrayed his rotundness, and he took off across the beach, up the stairs, into the house.

She turned back to the water, and admired it alone.

Greg nearly jumped up each stair, hitting the landing with full speed. He skid a bit, but caught momentum again as he burst through the door. There, he saw the three Crystal Gems, sitting at the counter in what was planned to be the kitchen, huddled together. They turned and looked at him, shocked by his sudden entrance.

"Amethyst!" he shouted, out of breath. "Do you have, uhh, any-any... ahhh... Dolls! Do you have any baby dolls I can borrow?"

She quirked an eyebrow at him. "What makes you think I'd have baby dolls?"

"Because of the trash pile! In your room!"

Pearl's head snapped to her. "I told you to clean that!"

"Get bent, it's my room! I'll do what I want!" She hopped down from the counter. "I'll see what I got, G-man." She walked to the temple. The star on the door flashed it's purple stone, and opened, unveiling an endless, yet contained, junkyard.

"Oh, stars..." muttered Pearl under her breath, turning away in abjection. The door shut behind Amethyst, and three then remained.

He looked to his former attacker, would-be murderer. He didn't approach. She'd hear him fine. "Ya know, I don't blame you." She turned her head only slightly, the tip of her nose and the beginnings of her eye all he could see. "It's a lot to process. A lot to... consider, think about. Whichever way you wanna say it. But I don't blame you for lashing out."

She didn't respond. Garnet, stoic, stood poised to intervene.

"I don't expect any of this to be easy. But for the kid-"

"I promised to help. I'll keep that promise, for her." She slouched over the counter, arms crossed. "That is that."

Greg almost reached for her, but ceased. It'd be enough for now.

Garnet flashed him a thumbs up. He nodded with a weak grin. Soon, the temple door opened. The junkyard had been completely rearranged, and Amethyst came running out. "I don't how it got here, man, but check it! A baby doll! It's sorta clean, too!"

She strolled up to Greg and handed it to him. He took it, and nodded. But as he turned to leave, a tiny grip on his shirt took him by surprise. He looked back at the small Gem.

"It'll be okay," was all she said.

He smiled. "Thanks." He ruffled her hair a little, took a small glance to Garnet, now grinning, and Pearl, still slouched over her arms. Her fingers were digging into the forearms, vibrating slightly. With that, he rushed out the door, down the stairs, back to the beach's edge.

As he ran, Greg somehow managed his remove his shirt with doll still in hand, and as closed in on Rose, he took the doll and swaddled it with the garment.

He sat back down next to her, and turned to her, beaming, absolutely out of breath. She saw what he had in his arms, and looked at him quizzically.

He sighed, though kept smiling. "If you won't be here to hold her-or him- then maybe we can pretend. Just for a moment?"

Rose lightened, and took the swaddling, gently. She tried to mimic how he'd held it. It seem to happen so naturally, and she held the doll close to her bosom. However, immediately, her face became concerned. "Uh, sweetie?"

"Yeah?"

"Why is it missing an eye?"

"Uhhh..." He looked. Sure enough, the doll had it's left eye missing. "Oh, geez, I'm sorry."

"Amethyst's?"

"Straight from her room."

They chuckled in unison. Rose brought it in close to her face. "Hello, little starlight." The doll said nothing. She beamed, sadly, and turned to him. "We still in agreement on the names?"

"You bet."

She put an arm around him, brought him in close to the doll.

Greg, with tearful eyes, took a finger and moved a bit of swaddling to look on it's face. He smiled.

"Hello, Steven... or Nora."

They laughed. In the distance, a beam of moonlight broke through the gray sky.

Tomorrow would be a new day.


End file.
